A thousand words

A spinning spoon will make froth. So I determine not to make froth. I like to live my life as if it were a model I am building and I am more interested in process than having a cut and dried future vision. I strive for success but prefer to keep the end picture fuzzy, variable. So this post series is about flawed thinking, instances of poor business sense, bad decisions, hasty judgements, a string of mistakes. And when I forget to draw from history I make the same mistake twice or on occasion over and over again.  In here too, is hard work, determination to never never never give up (thank you Winston Churchill), and to stay small, focused, and light on my feet. Enjoy the process. I can choose when to plough on or when to turn away. I am no cruiseliner as a designer. I’m one of those fast rubber dinghy boats. I have a short life to live, and a lot to do. My field for several years has been making patterns for architectural interiors. My dream is always to work with splendid architects, get my work manufactured large in scale in transparent or translucent materials. Stack them or hang them in layers. The site is STUDIODOON.

From there I go to a tiny scale. Business card scale. Networking cards for anyone who has not joined a company that strips their name on to the standard company card everyone else has. Or simply want a card completely their own. These are custom cards, designed differently for each individual. They carry all kinds of networking data that would never appear on a company card. I call them DOONCARDS. Anyone can use them but adults have an understanding of the intimate interaction when cards are exchanged. Young people generally don’t know the game. I have to create opportunities for kids to demonstrate to themselves how smoothly these cards can factor in their relationships. Great project. Kids live in a virtual cloud and here is one tiny physical item that one carries and gives away and it has all one’s information on it. One buys a piece of personal artwork and gets a thousand cards for free. Carving the marketing to be a fish through water is a slippery process.  DOONCARDS have yet to make money.

To fill in blanks, what else can I offer? I looked at my illustration skills, waiting for me to pick them up and dance again. I started doing portraits. Narrow focus once more. There is a wide application base here. From execs in annual reports to magazine features, every person is a portrait. I bring a fresh flat graphic style to it, mix it with some of my photography and I call the venture DOONFACE.

This posits a classic dilemma. When you take a direction and work at it, no matter what your field, and it does not yield income what do you do? How long do you keep at it. Persist or turn away? I’m squarely in the persistence camp. My gut is my guide. Throw in some common sense to stack the odds in my favor. Work hard. I’ll write further about these ventures but right now the point is there is no income from this work. My frustration is that this effort appears  commercially viable and yet no commerce going on. I see viability because it is visible in the market. It exists throughout print and electronic media daily. (See Tony Hsieh’s comment in the above post). So I spread my images out to potential clients. Calls and emails. Voicemails. The dark cage on the ocean floor, that’s what I think of voicemail.

Financially we sit on an ocean floor as well. This is serious instability. How we get through this, is what this blog is about. Negotiating with myself now takes strange turns. Should I stack shelves in a supermarket? I already got passed over at Kinkos. You had better honor your education, I told myself. More thought about change and persistence. This time I have no chips to bring to the table. Nada. Flat broke. We used up our resources getting this house and moving in. We sold a great old Land Rover three months ago. And now we are below sea level it seems, and it’s scary. We will be forced out of here in a few weeks and if this is point A, we don’t have a clue how to get to point B.  It’s the middle of a long cold winter.

Something nags at me. Instability runs through this like a river. Right now I can’t see light. Hard to make sense. There is work out there and I have to bring it home. Move closer to where there is a density of the stuff. The first time I went to New York was for raw excitement and I stayed and worked commercially for fifteen years. In New York there is always another possibility. The rhythm of projects and being paid is needed. I want my work in bedrooms and backpacks and the back seat of the car. Design inside life. Putting into play, at this late stage, the business of being a designer and illustrator, but with real, not imaginary clients.

Making sure that internet bill is paid is a monthly scramble. But we have learned how to do a fresh home cooked dinner for five dollars. Lessons are burning.